Caption Contest Challenge: Evil Nixon

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Rapid City, South Dakota—See that there? That’s our 37th president, Richard Milhous Nixon. And while you can’t see it in this photo, he’s actually sitting right across from a 24-hour Hardee’s just off Main Street in southwest South Dakota’s largest metropolitan area. 

Since Rapid City fancies itself as the gateway to the Black Hills, its street corners are decorated with statues of all the presidents who didn’t make it up onto the side of the big mountain. Calvin Coolidge is there, holding a saddle for some reason. So are Herbert Hoover and John Quincy Adams. It’s Mount Rushmore’s Island of Misfit Toys.

So what’s even going on in this photo? Why is Nixon smiling like that? Why are his hands clasped? What’s up with the menacing lizards just below the arm rests? Why is he flashing so much ankle? Did he just put a hit out on McGovern or something? What is the deal?

I have no idea, but maybe you do. Send us your best caption ideas in the comments, or ping me @timothypmurphy, and I’ll post the winner later today.

The winner gets…his/her entry posted. Sorry, guys; we’re on a budget here.

Profile shot below the jump, in case this one didn’t do it for you.

Update: We have winner: “Release the hounds, Smithers,” from commenter Eric Dana. I would also have accepted “Bring me the muggle, Nagini.”

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WE'LL BE BLUNT

It is astonishingly hard keeping a newsroom afloat these days, and we need to raise $253,000 in online donations quickly, by October 7.

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Readers also told us to just give it to you straight when we need to ask for your support, and seeing how matter-of-factly explaining our inner workings, our challenges and finances, can bring more of you in has been a real silver lining. So our online membership lead, Brian, lays it all out for you in his personal, insider account (that literally puts his skin in the game!) of how urgent things are right now.

The upshot: Being able to rally $253,000 in donations over these next few weeks is vitally important simply because it is the number that keeps us right on track, helping make sure we don't end up with a bigger gap than can be filled again, helping us avoid any significant (and knowable) cash-flow crunches for now. We used to be more nonchalant about coming up short this time of year, thinking we can make it by the time June rolls around. Not anymore.

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