Flowchart: “Can I Get Pregnant?”

Learn the biology of your body, according to conservative male lawmakers.

Remember the birds and the bees? The miracle of birth? Forget everything you knew. Turns out there’s a lot more to birthin’ babies than you might have learned in your godless socialist public-school health class. From this weekend’s assertion by Rep. Todd Akin (R-Mo.) that women can’t conceive babies during a “legitimate rape” to Rep. Steve King (R-Iowa) saying Monday that he didn’t know of any pregnancies caused by incest or statutory rape, conservative male lawmakers targeting reproductive rights have always held, shall we say, minority views on the biology of all things uterine.

Did you know about women’s natural stress-induced spermicides? Have you ever seen “God’s little protective shield” in a vagina? That’s because they don’t exist—but these legislators don’t know that.

If you’re of the double-X persuasion, all of this might leave you a bit flummoxed as to whether you’ll conceive. Well, don’t worry your pretty little head about it: We’ve collected the basics of reproductive biology according to conservative politicians, in a handy flowchart format. Need to determine your uterus’ destiny? Just ask these men!

Want it in chart form? Click to embiggen:

Interactive production by Tasneem Raja. Want to make your own “Choose Your Own Adventure” flowchart? Check out our GitHub page to fork our code!

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SIX TRUTHS

Reclaiming power from those who abuse it often starts with telling the truth. And in "This Is How Authoritarians Get Defeated," MoJo's Monika Bauerlein unpacks six truths to remember during the homestretch of an election where democracy, truth, and decency are on the line.

Truth #1: The chaos is the point.

Truth #2: Team Reality is bigger than it seems.

Truth #3: Facebook owns this.

Truth #4: When we go to work, we're in the fight.

Truth #5: It's about minority rule.

Truth #6: The only thing that can save us is…us.

Please take a moment to see how all these truths add up, because what happens in the weeks and months ahead will reverberate for at least a generation and we better be prepared.

And if you think journalism like Mother Jones'—that calls it like it is, that will never acquiesce to power, that looks where others don't—can help guide us through this historic, high-stakes moment, and you're able to right now, please help us reach our $350,000 goal by October 31 with a donation today. It's all hands on deck for democracy.

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