February 5, 2021

The GOP Is Seriously Ridiculous. And Ridiculously Dangerous.

“She said she knew nothing about lasers.”

Gaetz gazes at McCarthy on the House floorJim Lo Scalzo/AP

Fight disinformation: Sign up for the free Mother Jones Daily newsletter and follow the news that matters.

Now that former President Donald Trump has lost his gigantic megaphone, some members of the Republican Party have stepped in to compensate for his absence and are showering us with levels of absurdity unprecedented in the modern era. The party has abandoned all of the conventional trappings of governing and legislating and instead has opted to become the 24/7 comedy channel, as they go to great lengths to defend the most extreme members of their caucus. But let’s not be distracted by the hilarity of some of their antics. In doing that, we could also end up ignoring the inherent danger of one of the two major political parties being completely unserious. 

But first, let’s recap some of the fun over the last few days, actions that have really brought into sharp relief just how much of a farce they’ve become. Rep. Matt Gaetz (R-Fl.) famous for wearing a gas mask on the House floor to mock the coronavirus pandemic, tweeted about his shock at the newest horrors from the Democratic Party on Thursday. 

Wow, why do the Democrats hate America so much? Clearly, Gaetz says the pledge every chance he gets! Sure, having to drop what you’re doing—eating a meal, holding a conversation—in order to recite the pledge can be pretty difficult, but it’s the price one must pay to prove ones patriotism. 

Fetishizing the Pledge has been a long cherished GOP indoor sport, so his tweet alone should come as no surprise. It’s also minor league when it comes to this Republican’s shenanigans. Last week, Gaetz flew to Wyoming to troll Rep. Liz Cheney (R-Wyo.) because his colleague voted to impeach Trump. On Friday, after Greene’s press conference about how she had been stripped of her committee roles, Gaetz went on Fox News to praise her performance, saying he “almost had to smoke a cigarette afterwards.” Sir, please, this is a family show. 

Despite formidable competition, the real superstar of ridiculousness, however, has to be Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-Ga.), who was stripped of her committee roles after the House voted to punish her for advocating for, among other things, the execution of her Democratic colleagues. Among the litany of bizarre conspiracies Greene promoted, one of them had to do with the September 11 attacks. On the House floor, Greene was forced to accept reality about the events of that day.

Who among us hasn’t had to stand up in front of our colleagues and declare that yes, the terrorist attacks absolutely happened? In 2018, Greene made a video in which she acknowledged 9/11 had happened, but she claimed a plane did not crash into the Pentagon. That’s what makes her comments so remarkable now; 9/11 truthers don’t dabble in the idea that the attacks never happened. Their belief is that the attacks were a false flag event, planned by someone on the inside designed to make the public believe it was a terrorist attack. Greene’s overdue acknowledgement that 9/11 happened doesn’t actually do anything to make her beliefs, like say mass school shootings are also a false flag event, remotely acceptable.

Ever loyal, Rep. Jim Jordan (R-Ohio) offered this defense of Greene: “Everyone has done things they wish they didn’t do.” For once, I must acknowledge that he’s absolutely correct. Last summer, for example, I overwatered my tomato plants and ruined an entire harvest. Greene wants to execute her political opponents. We all make mistakes!

But while Jordan offered one asinine defense, one Republican said he had not even heard of the Greene saga. Sen. Tommy Tuberville (R-Ala.) declined to comment on his colleague in the House who had been dominating the headlines for the last week. Why? Well, because he has been unable to read the news on account of the weather.

Considering that Tuberville couldn’t correctly name the three branches of government, believed that World War II was fought to defeat communism, and suggested “moving” Inauguration Day until the pandemic was under control, I actually believe that this response was not a dodge. His was a sincere response from someone who has repeatedly demonstrated that he’s just not very bright.  

No need for Tuberville to worry about figuring out this confusing Greene business. For that unenviable job we have House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy (R-Calif.), who took it upon himself to clear up some of the other comments she’s made in the past. In 2018, Greene claimed that the California wildfires were started by a Jewish space laser. On its face, this is absurd. (Everyone knows that all the world’s religions have agreed to share the space lasers used for setting wildfires.) However, McCarthy assuaged any fears one might have about a sitting member of Congress believing in a blatantly anti-Semitic conspiracy theory. “She said she knew nothing about lasers,” he said solemnly.

Greene’s never heard of the lasers? Well then, case closed. 

Of course, laughing at the absurdity will only get us so far. (Adolf Hitler’s silly mustache was mocked as well.) And in the end, it’s likely that the Republicans will end up having the last laugh, as they so often do. Their insistence on responding to every societal ill—the pandemic, wealth inequality, systemic racism, climate change—with nothing but nonstop absurdity could eventually get me, and you, dear reader, killed. And when that happens, they’ll show up for my funeral packed in a small car, unmasked faces covered with colorful paint, and rubber red noses. Put it on my gravestone: Here lies Nathalie Baptiste, beloved daughter, wife, and friend—murdered by a bunch of clowns. 

WE'LL BE BLUNT

It is astonishingly hard keeping a newsroom afloat these days, and we need to raise $253,000 in online donations quickly, by October 7.

The short of it: Last year, we had to cut $1 million from our budget so we could have any chance of breaking even by the time our fiscal year ended in June. And despite a huge rally from so many of you leading up to the deadline, we still came up a bit short on the whole. We can’t let that happen again. We have no wiggle room to begin with, and now we have a hole to dig out of.

Readers also told us to just give it to you straight when we need to ask for your support, and seeing how matter-of-factly explaining our inner workings, our challenges and finances, can bring more of you in has been a real silver lining. So our online membership lead, Brian, lays it all out for you in his personal, insider account (that literally puts his skin in the game!) of how urgent things are right now.

The upshot: Being able to rally $253,000 in donations over these next few weeks is vitally important simply because it is the number that keeps us right on track, helping make sure we don't end up with a bigger gap than can be filled again, helping us avoid any significant (and knowable) cash-flow crunches for now. We used to be more nonchalant about coming up short this time of year, thinking we can make it by the time June rolls around. Not anymore.

Because the in-depth journalism on underreported beats and unique perspectives on the daily news you turn to Mother Jones for is only possible because readers fund us. Corporations and powerful people with deep pockets will never sustain the type of journalism we exist to do. The only investors who won’t let independent, investigative journalism down are the people who actually care about its future—you.

And we need readers to show up for us big time—again.

Getting just 10 percent of the people who care enough about our work to be reading this blurb to part with a few bucks would be utterly transformative for us, and that's very much what we need to keep charging hard in this financially uncertain, high-stakes year.

If you can right now, please support the journalism you get from Mother Jones with a donation at whatever amount works for you. And please do it now, before you move on to whatever you're about to do next and think maybe you'll get to it later, because every gift matters and we really need to see a strong response if we're going to raise the $253,000 we need in less than three weeks.

payment methods

WE'LL BE BLUNT

It is astonishingly hard keeping a newsroom afloat these days, and we need to raise $253,000 in online donations quickly, by October 7.

The short of it: Last year, we had to cut $1 million from our budget so we could have any chance of breaking even by the time our fiscal year ended in June. And despite a huge rally from so many of you leading up to the deadline, we still came up a bit short on the whole. We can’t let that happen again. We have no wiggle room to begin with, and now we have a hole to dig out of.

Readers also told us to just give it to you straight when we need to ask for your support, and seeing how matter-of-factly explaining our inner workings, our challenges and finances, can bring more of you in has been a real silver lining. So our online membership lead, Brian, lays it all out for you in his personal, insider account (that literally puts his skin in the game!) of how urgent things are right now.

The upshot: Being able to rally $253,000 in donations over these next few weeks is vitally important simply because it is the number that keeps us right on track, helping make sure we don't end up with a bigger gap than can be filled again, helping us avoid any significant (and knowable) cash-flow crunches for now. We used to be more nonchalant about coming up short this time of year, thinking we can make it by the time June rolls around. Not anymore.

Because the in-depth journalism on underreported beats and unique perspectives on the daily news you turn to Mother Jones for is only possible because readers fund us. Corporations and powerful people with deep pockets will never sustain the type of journalism we exist to do. The only investors who won’t let independent, investigative journalism down are the people who actually care about its future—you.

And we need readers to show up for us big time—again.

Getting just 10 percent of the people who care enough about our work to be reading this blurb to part with a few bucks would be utterly transformative for us, and that's very much what we need to keep charging hard in this financially uncertain, high-stakes year.

If you can right now, please support the journalism you get from Mother Jones with a donation at whatever amount works for you. And please do it now, before you move on to whatever you're about to do next and think maybe you'll get to it later, because every gift matters and we really need to see a strong response if we're going to raise the $253,000 we need in less than three weeks.

payment methods

We Recommend

Latest

Sign up for our free newsletter

Subscribe to the Mother Jones Daily to have our top stories delivered directly to your inbox.

Get our award-winning magazine

Save big on a full year of investigations, ideas, and insights.

Subscribe

Support our journalism

Help Mother Jones' reporters dig deep with a tax-deductible donation.

Donate